May 4, 2023
When listening to today's episode, you will likely not believe
the number of times the word 'hope' is spoken. From the very first
day that Jimmy's 22-year-old son, Lee, was killed in a car accident
16 years ago, Jimmy has clung to hope. Initially, that hope was
given to him by another bereaved father who stayed with him in his
home after Lee died. He said that although Jimmy could not feel it
at that moment, the pain would not always be so intense and that
his family would experience joy again. This was Jimmy's first
glimpse of hope.
In the coming months and years, Jimmy's grief was intense. There
were days when he did not think he could survive the pain, but that
little glimmer of hope remained. His faith never abandoned him, and
he would constantly remind himself of Psalm 118:24 - This is the
day that the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.
Each day, he would make the decision to choose joy. This did not
mean that he did not grieve deeply. Jimmy cried daily and would
allow the waves of grief to come. After those periods of deep
mourning, however, he would feel just a bit better.
Over time, that hope grew stronger and the joyful moments became
more frequent. Jimmy relates that years after Lee's death, their
first grandchild was born. He remembers looking into his wife's
eyes that day and seeing pure joy resonating there for the first
time since the accident. It had taken years, but it was there. That
does not mean that Jimmy has left his grief behind. It is always
right there with him. He even apologized before we started
recording, telling me that he would not be able to tell Lee's story
without tears.
That's what makes Jimmy's words so precious to me. If Jimmy were to
tell me just to feel joy and forget about the pain, I would have
cast him aside. If he had told me to cling to my grief and never
feel joy again, I would not be able to feel any hope for the
future. Jimmy, however, allows us to experience both. His parting
words to me today were, 'There is hope for joy in your life again.
Hold on to hope. Don't give up.'