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Losing a Child: Always Andy's Mom


As a pediatrician, married mom of three biological children and one foster son, my life was busy, rushing off to my office four days a week, seeing patients for three and working as a medical director of a local physician organization for one. I balanced this with rushing off to shuttle my kids to after sports and other after school activities. All of this changed one day in August of 2018 when my 14 year old son, Andy, was killed in a car accident. I felt like my life was over, and in some ways it was over, and a new life was forced to begin in its place. 

Grief is seldom discussed openly in our culture, and the death of a child makes people feel even more uncomfortable. On this blog and podcast, ‘Losing a Child: Always Andy’s Mom’, the topic is approached openly and honestly, speaking to people who have lost loved ones and experts who help care for them. Whether you are a parent experiencing loss or someone who wants to support another going through this tragedy, this blog and podcast strives to offer hope and help.

Feb 23, 2022

Shortly after recording today's episode, I received an email from today's guest, Shirlene. I want to share part of that email with all of you - 'I was giving blood today and my “Krissy” tattoo was in full view … the phlebotomist asked me about Krissy and she shared that her sister had died from sepsis too… we shared some thoughts, words, and tears….but then she said to me…, ”may I ask what your favorite memory is about Krissy? I’m sure you have many…” I was so touched and so eager to share and talk about her and revel in all those wonderful memories. It was such a beautiful couple of minutes for us.'

Storytelling is such an amazing way to share with others. Whether it is the weekly hour-long storytelling that we do on the podcast or a quick memory that you tell someone you just met, both can bring us little bits of comfort and joy. This email from Shirlene reminds us all of the power of sharing with other people. 

Shirlene goes on to ask in her email, 'How can we let people know we want to talk about them, remember them, share them?' I think one answer to that question is to model it to them. Relate funny, happy stories about your own child. Ask others to share a favorite memory of their own loved one. By showing this is not taboo, hopefully, we can help change the world a little bit at a time.